Responses If You Get Caught Sleeping on the Job

“They told me at the blood bank this might happen.”

“This is just a 15-minute power nap like they raved
about in that time-management course you sent me to.”

“I was working smarter – not harder.”

“Whew! I musta left the top off the liquid paper.”

“Oh, I wasn’t sleeping! I was meditating on our mission
statement and envisioning a new paradigm!”

“This is one of the seven habits of highly effective
people!”

“I was testing the keyboard for drool-resistance.”

“I was trying to remember where that difficult “Z” Key
was, and now it is indelibly imprinted on my brain, or
at least my forehead.”

“I’m in the management training program.”

“I’m actually doing a ‘Stress Level Elimination Exercise
Plan’ (SLEEP) I learned at the last mandatory seminar
you made me attend.”

“This is in exchange for the six hours last night when
I dreamed about work!”

“I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve
work-related stress. Do you discriminate against people
who practice Yoga?”

“Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured
out a solution to our biggest problem.”

“Uh, hey, whaddaya expect… the coffee machine is
broken…”

“Someone must’ve put decaf in the wrong pot.”

“Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won’t
wear off!”

“Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of
the workaholic!”

“I wasn’t sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact
lens without my hands.”

“The mailman flipped out and pulled a gun so I was
playing dead to avoid getting shot.”

“Geez, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day.”